Welcome to my blog!

This blog is an honest look at what life is like for this particular American convert to Islam. We're taught in Islam to cover our sins, to not air them, for fear of lessening the severity of sinning. In this blog, I may relate past indiscretions from time to time. This isn't to make light of them, but in the interest of educating Muslims and non-Muslims alike as to the realities of life as an American convert, I present my mistakes honestly. I make no excuses for them, nor do I claim that they were okay to make. I am not perfect, and I make no pretenses as to that. If others can learn from my past, know that Islam, and religion in general, is open for people no matter what mistakes they've made, then I will gladly air my sins when needed.

Tuesday, April 27, 2010

The most amazing thing, EVER.

I'm making a web kiosk in Flash class.  It is beyond amazing, I tell you.  I'll post it somewhere when I'm done.

Anyway, what happened last week at work?  I know you want to know.  So I'll tell you!

Tuesday I went to get my paycheck, showed up, and Jeff and Ricardo ask if I'd gotten their message.  I was like, "Lolwut?  Message?  Haha, nice one."  And then I worked from 6-10.  Now, I'm not saying I'm a shift-whore.  No, that would involve me seeking out shifts.  I prefer the term shift-pimp, as that implies that I let the shifts come to me.  I also never say no.  This metaphor's rapidly falling apart.

Wednesday I went with two friends to the dollar moves (I remember when they were a dollar, darn it!  ONE FREAKING DOLLAR!) and saw Tooth Fairy.  Dwayne Johnson, I love you.  He is hilarious, I say.  Hilarious.  ^_^

Thursday I worked.  Nothing really happened.  At least, not that I can remember.  ARGH!  I remember!  I got pulled over for my tags being expired!  And I got a TICKET!  The officer told me it wasn't a fix-it ticket, either.  Moooooore on that below.

Sunday, April 18, 2010

Waitress McAwesomesauce, at your service!

We were dead for most of last night.  I was scheduled off at 4 this morning.  Then Ricardo said I was going home at 1 or 2.  Then it was 3.  Then we got slammed.  It was actually a pretty decent night; I had a four-top of ladies who told Elise that it had been the best Restaurant of Awesome experience they'd ever had, and that they were definitely coming back.  :D

That despite these allergies.  I.  Am.  Waitress McAwesomesauce.  I also got tipped $14 on a $32 tab.  Heeeeeck, yeah!  They were a good table, despite one guy's tendency to answer my questions of "How are you tonight?" and "Is everything tasting okay?" with such reasonable, on-topic replies as, "I want smothered cheese fries" and "Unstoppable" --- which is only part of the name of a particular meal we serve.  Despite that, he was the one paying, and thus tipping.

God, I'm making this sound like all I care about are tips.  I don't.  I really do enjoy my job, and I'd work at my RoA even if I didn't get tipped.  Tips are just a very, very, very pleasant bonus, and my bank account and I really appreciate them.  Quite often they keep me from overdrawing my account.

A nice police officer asked about my hijab.  First he asked what it was, then if I'd been Muslim all my life, then if I converted because of a Muslim boyfriend.  Lol, Muslim boyfriend.  That's an oxymoron if there ever was one.  Well, if you define "dating" by society's current standard.  Muslims "date," of a sort ... it's more like courtship, really.  You're never allowed to be alone together, and you're talking with each other with an eye toward possibly getting married.

Oh, God, my friend's cat was apparently taken from her mama way too early, so when she kneads, she drools.  I didn't realise this until she was drooling as I left a voice-mail for another friend, so I was all, "Oh, dear God, why?!  Why God, why?!" on the voice-mail, wailing about the cat drooling on me.  It was funny.  Then we all took a nap.

Friday, April 16, 2010

Next time I'm breaking your fucking window, assholes.

To whoever owns the blue/navy blue 4-door car with the California license plate number 6BPV407, I hate you and may you burn in Hell for having the audacity to not only run out on a $73 tab, but to not even stop your fucking car when I'm banging on your God-damned window.  Seriously?  Fuck you.  Fuck all four of you, you stupid assholes.  I.  Hate.  You.

The police have your license number and your car's description.  One of you even recognised Gina-Bean and fucking told her so.  When you come back in, because you assholes are always stupid enough to come back in, then we're calling the fucking cops and I hope you get dragged off to jail.  If I lose my job over this, I'm going to go seriously ballistic.

I.  Hate.  WALK-OUTS.

Tuesday, April 13, 2010

Communicate with your servers, please!

What happened last night?  I'm trying to remember.  Argh, I hate it when I want to update and then forget why I'm updating.

I worked for Gina-Bean last night, 'cause she called me yesterday morning sounding very dead.  It was fairly uneventful, except for the man who wouldn't even look at me when I was trying to take his order and check up on him, and mumbled everything.  I asked my manager to check up on him, and Jeff said he did the same thing, so the guy was just rude and it wasn't me in particular.

Oh, and the girl who refused to actually say what she wanted.  It was all "I want this," with pointing.  So I did what I always do.  I asked which one, and told her that I couldn't see what she wanted because my contacts were fuzzy.  Her friend ended up saying what exactly she wanted.  It wasn't even like she couldn't speak English (you non-English speakers get a break in that department, so long as you, you know, actually try to communicate with me).  She just wouldn't say the name of the meal she wanted.  When customers try that thing with me, I play dumb.  It may be rude of me, but there's no need for me to play Twenty Questions when you can freaking SAY you want the Smoked Chicken Quesadilla, rather than pointing at the tiny print that I have to lean over the table, and nearly across the lap of the guy you're sitting by, just to read.

Oh, also, please don't mumble, and use clear gestures.  If I'm not sure what you're saying or gesturing, I'm going to repeat myself.  If I keep repeating myself, it means that I can't understand you and you need to be more clear.  Don't give me a dirty look because you aren't communicating clearly with me.

In other news, a guy said he had a question for me and it was kind of personal, so I immediately fired back with, "Yes, I'm Muslim, yes, I was born in America.  I converted a month ago."

Yesterday was my one-month anniversary of converting, by the way.  Send Twinkies.

Anyway, then I asked, "Is that what you were wondering?"  It was.  ^_^  Another guy asked pretty much the same thing, so I said the same thing, but it turns out he remembered me from the last time I worked at the RoA (Restaurant of Awesome, if you don't recall from previous posts), and wanted to know if it was me or not.

The night was going good until my coworker Judy came in at 6, when I was supposed to be off.  Turns out Jeff put the wrong person in the cash register, so I had to stick around until the manager came in at 7, but hey, it's more money for me.  And .02 hours of overtime, lol.

So I skipped class today and slept instead.  Then I went and got my check-up at the optometrist for my contacts and then paid my storage unit.  The guy said he accepts payments of Chipotle, lol, so next time I need to pay I'll bring him some.  ^_^

Sunday, April 11, 2010

Muslim Lost & Found

So, that one 'vert I mentioned before?  Yeah, we found him.  He's apparently doing well, active in the MSA (Muslim Student Alliance) at the college across the street, coming to Jummah prayers ... so it's all good!  Yay!

A week of updates!

So, it's been a while.  Sometimes life takes over and does things I don't want it to.

Anyway!  Where was I?  What was my last post?  Wow, it's been a week?  Well, let's see what happened this past week.

Monday I hung out with my friend Muzhda; Victoria came, too, and we went to the Roseville Galleria, then back to Muzhda's for an Afghani dinner.  It was too spicy for me, but yummy.  ^_^  It's always awesome to hang around Muslims; I don't get to do it often enough, because it's generally a bit of a drive to get to the masjid, and after Jummah prayers, I tend to go back home to sleep because I work at 10pm on Friday nights.

Tuesday I got new contacts and ordered glasses, thanks be to God!  Very awesome.  Pictures to come soon!  I also had dinner with Victoria.

Thursday I went rollerskating with Victoria and her boy, and brought my baby brother.  Wow, rollerskating is SUCH great exercise!  Work was, as I recall, uneventful.  I've been really tired all this week, so I just kinda chilled.

Sunday, April 4, 2010

Multi-porpoise posting.

Lol, do you see what I did, there?  :D

I was supposed to take Gina-Bean's shift tonight, 'cause her car isn't fixed/registered yet.  She texted me earlier to confirm, I said yeah, and then I go a text just now saying she was working anyway.  Turns out her phone's not taking texts right now ... But I'm taking her shift tomorrow, and, God willing, she'll have her new car soon.

In other news, our convert support group's meeting next Sunday!  Yay!  I'm also hosting a ladies' tea party next Sunday, so it'll be after the meeting.  Gotta e-mail the two brothers I met and say, "Yo, my brothas, come kick it!"  :P

Also, my Easter hijab:

I got the idea from this hijab tutorial on YouTube, by HijabTrendz.  Should have used the yellow scarf as the underscarf, rather than my not-quite-matching bandana, lo..  ^_^  Then I just experimented.  It got a little uncomfortable around the neck, but eh, it was liveable.  If you want to do what I did, layering two of them, then you need to wrap both scarves simultaneously.  Layer one on top of the other and adjust how much of the lower one you want showing, then wrap the bottom, then the top, adjust, and repeat.  ^_^  You can fiddle with the gathers around the neck, and which parts are over your shoulders, which is nice.

Anyway, your Hijabi Waitress is enjoying her night off and right now, wishes she had a husband to rub her feet for her.

It's called a "he-job" ...

... 'cause "he job" is to keep me all wrapped up and warm!

... That's my current favourite response when I'm asked what my hijab is.  :P

God loves me; I have proof!

So, there was a brother who converted (reverted ... 'verted) the day I did, and we appear to have lost him. >:P How embarrassing. Anyway, let's see ... this is Sunday, so it was Saturday morning, thus Friday night. This is how I have to remember what days things happened on, because I work overnight.

Anyway, Friday evening I got some e-mails from the convert support group my masjid has, informing me of this and generally asking if anyone has seen him/knows his number/etc., so we can check up on him. I said that if I saw him at Denny's then I'd say hi and see how he's doing.

Well, Friday night I worked until 6am for Gina-Bean. I stayed until about 6:30am, and these two guys said assalam alaykum to me, so I was all happy. Then I noticed that the white guy (the other turned out to be of Mexican descent) kinda looked like our MIA 'vert. So I asked him when he'd taken Shahada, and whilst it turns out he's NOT our missing 'vert, he and his friend are both converts of last July and 15 years, respectively, and they are SUCH nice dudes. I gave them the address of this blog. Hi, guys! *waves* ^___^

Anyway, we talked for quite a while, and they're both very interested in my masjid's convert group, and said that if they saw our missing 'vert around, they'd let him know that the masjid is worried about him. Oh, and you remember the two Muslims from a few posts down? The ones where the wife had recently converted? Yeah, my new friends know them, lol. So they'll pass on my e-mail, which I, in all my dorkiness, forgot to do when I was talking with the woman and her husband, so we can all be awesome together. They also know the brother who runs the local halal shop.

I also have about $160 in cash saved up for my eye appointment that I made for Tuesday, right after I give blood again (I am SUCH a superhero, you have NO idea --- and so modest about it, too), and I will, God willing, have enough to get not only the glasses eye exam, but also the more expensive contacts eye exam. Iiiiiiiiiii'm so happyyyyyyyyy! :D

Dude, I totally chilled at work last night. We had a crummy bar rush, so I just told Gina-Bean and Elise to tell me when they wanted me to take tables, and spent the rest of my shift rolling silverware, lol. I also paid my dad $20 out of the $35 I owe him ... but, my paycheck on Monday should be HELLA big (I'm from Humboldt; I say hella! Wanna fight?) so my phone bill, eye exams, and Dad's money should all be able to fit in it, with money to spare for my poor savings account. ^_^

I also made Fajr today; my Easter resolution is to pray all 5 prayers on time today. :D

Thursday, April 1, 2010

Random things on extra shifts.

I picked up an extra shift ... not yesterday ... Tuesday! Yeah, it was supposed to be a 6-10, but I went home around, what, 1am? Lol, that rhymed.

Anyway, other than not being used to working before 10pm when the menu switches over and therefore not remembering that kids eat free on certain days (yeah, way to be subtle there, uh-huh), I was bussing a table as one group was leaving, and I overheard a man talking about "Five Percenters." He didn't say anything to me, but I do know that the Five Percenters are some form of Islam, and I wasn't sure if I'd sparked the remark or not.

Oh, Google, you're such a stud of a search engine. Come here and give me info on the Five Percenters. (spamusegooglespam)

... Uh. Wikipedia says they're crazy people who don't like crackers like me. See the pasty skin? That seems to be a no-go for the 5%'ers. Hmmm. Maybe it didn't have anything to do with me, after all, and I just happened to be the only Muslim around whilst he was discussing crazy quasi-Muslims (hint: if your leader is calling themselves God or claiming to be divine, they're not preaching Islam). But still. It was kinda odd.

EDIT: Oaky, I actually read the entire article, and most 5%'ers don't claim to be Muslim, and most are actually quite awesome, pillar-of-the-community type people, so I take back most of my declarations of craziness. (They make more sense than Scientologists, at any rate ...)

And last night I went to work for some food after Isha and had to fight with my manager J to get a sampler. I got a banana split, first, and he said that I could have the split, then split. :P Then he said that if I stayed, he'd put me to work. And then he put me to work. :D So I ended up picking up another 1.5 hours. Yaaaaaay, my next paycheck is gonna be HUGE! And I got my gummint munneh already, so as soon as Bel-Air opens (they have Bank of America in them! I hate BoA) I can go get my $50 rent money, and then tonight I'm going roller-skating with friends from the masjid. Ooooh, hopefully with this next paycheck, I can finally get an eye exam and new glasses & contacts.

Also, my baby rat's cage has a hole in the top for a link to a different cage, and since I don't have a different cage, she climbs up out of the hole and sits on top, then climbs down onto my dresser and chills. She's so adorable. Aqua the cat is still stupid, but lovey and adorable as well.

*sings* It's my blog, and I'll blog what I want to, blooog what I want to ...

Ooooh, also, please remember that if you and your group need to use the restroom, either pay your bill first or don't all go at once, kthx. I had a group of girls do just that and I thought they'd walked out. I was ready to kill someone, and then I saw them paying. Aaaaargh!

... didn't even tip me ...